Inferno - The Book Review!!

Should I call it a travelogue that transcends you to Florence, Venice, Istanbul.. or call it a political drama depicting the details and dynamics - between govt agencies, powerful private firms, influencial individuals, rebellious intellects, learned laureates - that have power to change the face of the world all together.. or is it a science encyclopedia that leaves you in awe of possible technologies, inventions, genetic engineering.. or a movie script brimming with emotions, mindset and feelings of different individuals bound by one story.. .. a cultural kaleidoscope.. a literary catalogue.. a complete art book in itself...pating tribute to various artforms - Painting, Architecture, Literature and artists - Michaeangelo, Dante and more..

Could not have asked for more as a fan and avid reader.. Feeling similar to what I had felt when I was a kid and watched a magician playing different tricks - left me speechless the best possible way!!! Thank you Dan Brown, for sharing piece of your mind, ur soul and ur passion..I could see and feel that in every word🙏🏼😊

Inspiration Courtesy : The 620 pages!!  

End to the dead end!!

“I am not sure if I am depressed; but the sumptoms say it so clearly. I feel those bubbles in stomach many a times and I break down, start crying.. and all of this for no reason at all. 

I use to have dreams and purpose in life, small but still they were there. But no more. I am just dragging myself somehow. Living so that my parents and people who love me can live. Infact I try to keep myself happy as well.

But I dont think so any of it is working or will work in future. I dont feel suicidal. I mean not that I CANNOT handle all of this. Rather, I DONT WANT to handle any of it. And I dont see a way out. 

Should I ask for help. I should but even that effort is somethig I dont want to make. What has happened.

I could have reached out to a couple of friends who would have probably helped. But I have closed those doors myself cz I had to and opening them would mean even more mess. 

So I cannot destroy myself ; I dont feel like creating myself and worst of all, I dont want to seek help. Dead End!!!”

-

From a depressed person around you..who DO NOT WANT to seek help from you..but maybe you NEED TO!!

You just need to convince him / her for one simple FACT - THERE IS NEVER A DEAD END!! There is always a way out!! There is always an end to ‘the dead end’!!

#MentalHealth #SaveASoul #TalkItOut #LiveItOutTogether #LetItOut #UnleashEmotions

Perspective!!

When the hands of clock are right and the positions of stars, then I will rise and shine!!! #Fortune

For those who think that one line on my hand drives my life, they know it right..what they dont know is how hard I got that line! #Struggle

Why cant they accept I can be the family girl but still have the wit in me to have fun with the sip of wine!! #Innocence

Its hard for them to admit that those whi have spark of life in their eyes, can only take the pain to crib and whine!! #Hope

Why cant be the birthgivers be God for someone and no love or shrine!! #Faith

You can live a life after life; Can be dead inside but outside, be on cloud nine!! #Drive

Even when a beloved one dies, u have lunch the very same day, the very same night u dine!! #Necessities

If we all are humans and sin...why cant I have share which is mine!! #Human

When the hands of clock are right as per I feel, then I will rise and shine!! #IAmMe

Please Dont Care!!

It is my first funeral as far as I can remember.. I was told it was my second and I agreed since I had vague memories of the first one I attended at the age of 4..of my Grandpa’s. This time it was Granny!! After 23 years..

Chaos, cries, cremation props, corpse...all were one inside another.. I am not sure if it was the climate of the room that made me more sick or the mishap itself. I too wanted to cry out loud like a few others in the room whom I have rarely seen, not seen at all, seldom met, never ever atleast not till Granny was alive. Looks like they loved the granny more dead than alive else they would have atleast showed up or called to check on her health once in a while, offered to keep her positive company, asked Mum n Dad if they needd financial / moral assistance while they were taking care of my then bed-ridden Old lady. But as I said, they loved Granny more dead than alive because their crying decibels were any day greater than My parents’. Or may be it was one of those hideous trends of society where you just ‘have to’ even if u dont ‘want to’. To show that you care even if You dont care! 

Before this thought could end, I had another trail as I saw folks offering clothes(in this case Saree) to the corpse! And I was like “seriously dude!!”. I mean what good will that do. Shouldnt that be offered to some clothe-less n needy instead?! What is the point?! No point..just #HideousTrendOfSociety

The story did not end here. Post cremation, instead of just trying to get over the tragedy or in my case, consoling my parents to get over it, we had to arrange for shower and organize lunch for almost 100 folks that too not at some hotel motel but in our home. I mean, “HOW CAN SOCIETY BE SO INSENSITIVE AND POINTLESS AND MEAN AND STUPID”. I am sure everyone who came there knew the gravity of the situation and state of mind of my parents who have just happened to lost their parent; so why did not they just leave after offering thwir condolences. Why did I have to serve lunch to some random bunch of guys who least cared about my grandmother or her illness while she was alive; instead of lending my shoulder to my mother who served my granny her days n blinkless nights; or just hold my dad’s hand and say to him that I am there to take care of him. I could not do any of it. I just had to follow the NORMs and I did but I was screaming inside. I wanted all of them to leave except for couple whose presence actually mattered and made difference. Why cry when u never cared; infact why be there at all. 

That day in that room, I was having more thoughts on the follies of the society and its customs and so called culture; than mourning over the dead. That day in that room, there were more that one corpse - that of sensibilities of society that we are, that of logic which should have long ago made us out-practice fake customs and rituals, that of courage that should have made us question the status-quo.

Inspiration Courtesy : Pointless Customs, traditions and we the folks who follow it!!

#DaduRIP #BauWeLoveYou

Looks could be deceiving!!

Appearances speak louder than self!!

Before I had said a single word, I ws judged cz I had worn salwar kameez, with a rain-washed laptop bag, frizzy hair due to travel-pollution and had put on pump shoes aparently to save myself frm tan and dirt(Yes, on the very same day it rains, its scorchingly hot and u get mild shivers as well if u r in Pune these days). I escorted this look of mine into a 5 star hotel where all other ladies carried high heels, a gucci handbag, all set-gelled up high pony tails and icing on the cake - dressed up in an elegant ‘dress’..I was being judged to be someone who cannot and should not wven enter the five star arena.

As I was waiting for my brother in the lobby..oh yes, the context - I had gone there to meet my brother who was in the town for a high profile conference, so to speak..and since he was put up in the other corner of the world , relative to where My den was in the sam city, I decided to spare him of the ‘city-traffic-experince’ and planned to visit him myself..

So as I waited for him in the hotel lobby..I was bombarded with these K3g looks..which said ‘Look at her clothes, so old school’; ‘look at her hair, so frizzy’ and blah blah..

I want to interrupt this narration of mine here and give you a background of my Dressing-sense..I dont know what it is!! Although people think the sense exists in me but in it worst form!! I have been ill-known for my bad dressing-sense basically right since my college days..

Though I was never conscious about it..

But that day in the lobby, It was for the first time I was not exactly embarrased but kind of uncomfortable with my own self..

And I decided I will start and try “Jesa des vesa bhes..” Will carey myself more un-awkwardly for sake of others and for my own self of course..

The thoughts continued..some of them jumped to something totally unrelated..others relentlessly hovered on..and yes I met bhaiya..he was not well, probably foodpoisoned and we had to rush to doctor..another interesting story (having potential to be my next blog) but I will save it for some other day..

That night I slept with the same thoughts..

And Woke up the next morning with a hangover..I had to go out that day again..to the same place..to see of bhaiya..I stepped towards my wardrobe, took out a nice attire but as I was about to get into it, I thought nahhh..this is not me.. I mean I can never wear what I dont want to and just because I have to.. I feel best and most confident when I am in my own skin, and even a layer over that..

I picked up this time, a worn off jeans who has travelled overseas and more..and has been with me through several autumns and winters and just like a best friend with whom you fight, swear not to ever talk again and hang up on him or her but end but being the besties again..I worn those denims matched up with an archaic plain black tshrt..folded its already halved sleeves to hide their loose ends and walked off indifferently as ever..

And guess who did I meet this time?! 

Same K3g looks..of course..but who cares!!!

Inspiration Courtesy : To the ‘kati-collar’ holed-up tees; ‘fossilled’ denims and to all my friends and family folks who tolerate me without getting embarrased ofcmy appearance and so called ‘dressing’ sense!! Love you all for letting me be at the cost of those looks😜 See u this festive season in the ‘museumed’ traditionals!!

Happy Diwali!! 

Belittling Mountains!!

Vows are taken in public but missing are those small little silent promises

Marriages are grand in execution but relationships are torn over petty issues while in execution

More days to celebrate with Festivals from other cultures coming around but no festivity at heart or in mood

I live amidst of #belittlingMountains, smtimes be one!!

Issues are created out of nowhere; but nowhere do I see issues being talked about or raised rationally

We find family in friends these days but miserably fail to befriend our own family

We talk about love so much on social platforms but never say it out loud enough for our own self to hear that clearly

I live amidst of #belittlingMountains,

Saying nothing,

Becoming one!!

Inspiration Courtesy : To a friend who is gracious enough to give his copyrighted title to me and inspire me always..to write..more n better! #belittlingMountains

Game of time and space!!

What do you call a masterpiece of experiences?! Watching this movie was exactly that!!

"Room" is the first movie ever whose genre I felt was somewhat misconveyed. A drama directed to have an impact of thriller for the first half and a philosophical metaphoric quest for the latter!! 

The thriller part is the story of a kid(Jack) born and brought up for five autumns in a shed by his mother(Ma) till they were finally able to execute a plan and escape from their captivator. This is what his reaction is, verbatim, when he steps out and realizes there is a world beyond his world.

"There's so much of "place" in the world. There's less time because the time has to be spread extra thin over all the places, like butter." there with her friend Leo now. And Grandpa lives far away. I've seen persons with different faces, and bigness, and smells, talking all together. The world's like all TV planets on at the same time, so I don't know which way to look and listen. There's doors and... more doors. And behind all the doors, there's another inside, and another outside. And things happen, happen, HAPPENING. It never stops. Plus, the world's always changing brightness, and hotness. And there's invisible germs floating everywhere. When I was small, I only knew small things. But now I'm five, I know EVERYTHING!"

The philosophical quest potrays what he feels about this world viz-a-viz his room and how he misses the time that he use to spend with his mother and there were no 'worldy' distractions. In one part of the movie, his longing for those times made him say something so deep, unknowingly and I could not resist quoting it unaltered :

"There's so much of "place" in the world. There's less time because the time has to be spread extra thin over all the places, like butter."

Speechless I am!!

Beautiful story told in even more beautiful way and left me wondering how complex yet so simple are these games of space-time!

Needless to say, a Must watch!!

Inspiration Courtesy : The one who makes me watch these movies ☺️ And of course all the storytellers!!! 

Ounce of life in trans!!

"Dear Baby, I hope someday somebody wants to hold you for 20 minutes straight and that's all they do. They don't pull away. They don't look at your face. They don't try to kiss you. All they do is wrap you up in their arms and hold on tight, without an ounce of selfishness to it."

-

Verbatim from the movie "Waitress"..

Sometimes some movies are not at all relatable in terms of plots or situations. Yet somewhere deep down they are in perfect harmony with what you feel and they hit that bare naked emotion of your heart which was covered layers beneath till date. 

Probably that is why so many of us enjoy watching movies. Most of us live through them..even though a transient life, even though unknowingly, but we live - Through characters, at times through the plot, not to forget the music, score and lyrics - yes!! And in those moments, there is a sense of fulfilment, a sense of purpose, a sense of hope, a sense of belonging, a sense of living an actual real life in those virtual realities!!

M afraid I have said too much too deep!!

Signing off to be in another trans 😊

#Inspiration Courtesy - Adrienne Shelly, Keri Russell, Nathan Fillion and others😊 Thank you Darls for the treat!!

Few Words By Words!!

I have been a fan of music as a whole but somehow always with a special bias towards the music which has classy lyrics associated with it..

Was listening to this song from yet another upcoming typical bollywood movie..it was all about that same feeling you find in Every other song these days - non acceptance of one's love..

However, even then, I felt like listening to it again and again..Reason : Words! Lyrics!! They are as new, as fresh and as rejuvenating everytime they come from a different lyricist, even when the feelings behind each one is different; infact they feel new even when they are coming from same person, on same feeling but in a different timeFrame..cz you never feel the exact same way twice!!

So this one is to all the lyricists and poets - thanks for transporting us to different times of our lives..even the ones which we never had!!

Cheers!!

Inspiration Courtesy : Kausar Munir for "Maana k hum yaar nahi.." and many others who said Few Words by Words!!

Maana Ke Hum Yaar Nahin

Maana ke hum yaar nahin


Lo tay hai ke pyaar nahin

Phir bhi nazrein na tum milaana


Dil ka aitbaar nahi


Maana ke hum yaar nahi…

Raaste mein jo milo toh


Haath milaane ruk jaana

Ho…
Saath mein koi ho tumhare


Door se hi tum muskaana

Lekin muskaan ho aisi


Ki jisme ikraar nahi

Nazron se na karna tum bayaan


Woh jis’se inkaar nahi


Maana ke hum yaar nahi…

Phool jo band hai panno mein


Tum usko dhool bana dena

Baat chhide jo meri kahin


Tum usko bhool bataa dena

Lekin wo bhool ho aisi


Jis’se bezaar nahin

Tu jo soye toh meri tarah


Ik pal ko bhi karaar nahin


Maana ki hum yaar nahi…

– Kausar Munir